Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Sorry about my life...
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
