I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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