so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
