don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
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