Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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