She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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