Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
