you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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