He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
