Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize