I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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