Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Randomize
