how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
No subtext here. People are naked.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
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