I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
soo... how was my night?
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
