So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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