Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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