I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
