im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize