Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
