i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
