seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
