we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
i wish my penis had a tongue
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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