Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
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