I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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