There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
