ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Randomize
