Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
