Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Randomize
