ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
