And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize