Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
