Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
