I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
