just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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