Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
