Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
You may now shotgun with the bride
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
Randomize
