you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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