On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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