your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
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