I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
