I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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