im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I have so many feelings about this burrito
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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