New invention idea: vibrating tampons
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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