sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
worst night to have a conscience
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Randomize
