how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
