I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
