Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
