I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize
