the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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