The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Randomize