I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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