I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
He has the fingertips of a God
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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